Reflections on the Finish

What a last 72 hours it has been. I suppose it started with the morning of the Mount Katahdin summit.

When I woke up, it did not feel like any sort of special moment. Five, Firestarter, and I all headed up together, remarking on the slowness of the day hikers (nothing against day hikers!) and playing infinite questions. But as we got higher, I started slowing down and falling behind them. I think it was seeing the higher reaches of the mountain ahead of me. This was my last summit, the last mountain in a mountain of challenges. 

At the Table Land, a flat alpine area with very little vegetation, it really started hitting me. I thought about Georgia, and everything in between, and all of the hard times. Then I thought of all the good times. And then I thought of everything that was beyond my thru-hike. I thought of my family and friends who were pulling for me with every step and of all the people I hardly knew or didn't know that were also following my journey on the blog. Realizing that I was not alone on the mountain was very powerful. It felt so good to know that I had come through and succeeded not only for myself, but everyone following along.

All of these thoughts flooded my head as I looked at the top of the mountain ahead of me. I could even see people standing next to the KATAHDIN sign. Strangely, however, when I got to the top, nothing happened as I thought it would. There was no crying, no kneeling before the sign, no flood of relief or accomplishment. Even the sign was smaller than I imagined it would be. Instead, I was just in a sort of daze, looking from the sign to the view to the friends around me. My friend Vulture offered to take some pictures of me at the sign and it felt strange standing behind and feeling done. I couldn't make myself feel done!

Slowly but surely, however, it has hit me exactly what has transpired. I'm coming around to the fact that I have no hiking to do tomorrow, or the next day, or the next day. And Mount Katahdin is not a goal that lies in the future, its something that I did on August 13th. Even right now, writing this blog update from my computer, I'm realizing that I'm home. I have all the comforts of my house. And I'll be sitting in class in just a few days. It's very strange!

People at home have been asking me, "Is it like you're on another planet?" No, not really. It's more like I'm living somebody else's life! Who is this guy who uses toilets and sleeps in a bed and writes emails?! Me and the rest of the thru-hikers, we all said good bye to our trail names in a way when we said good bye to each other. No one knows me as Scribbles like Tate and Firestarter and Five knew me as Scribbles. I think that leaving this wonderful thru-hiking community will be the hardest part of the transition back.

With all that said, I'm glad to be back. I'm glad to be listening to WCUW, and playing vintage baseball, and watching the Yanks on TV. I'm glad to be in one spot, and playing guitar, and seeing my girlfriend and family and everyone who I've missed. I've already reunited with a ton of people who I haven't seen since March or earlier! Even though the transition's not going to be easy, I am happy that I've hiked 2,189 miles and there is no more to do.

I'm at my mom's in Connecticut right now, seeing friends and re-setting for the real world. More to come soon, as the transition continues! Pictures for sure.

- Scribbles (aka Ted)

8:44 p.m. 8/15/2015